On the other hand

A thoughtful contrarian look at the scandal surrounding "fake" reporter Jeff Gannon.

Papal Bull

(The following is for anyone still on the fence as to whether the current pope is a fascist shitbag.)

Splashed across Drudge at the moment is the large-font abomination, "Pope: Gay Marriage Part of 'Ideology of Evil.'" After wiping the vomit off my keyboard, I hyperlinked myself over to the article. Let's see how it reads, shall we?

Pope Calls Gay Marriage Part of 'Ideology of Evil'

ROME (Reuters) - Homosexual marriages are part of "a new ideology of evil" that is insidiously threatening society, Pope John Paul says in a new book published Tuesday.

Great timing, JP. Couldn't you have excreted those few hundred smooth pages while I still had a sinus infection? Cause there were times when anything softer than sandpaper would have been a blessing, dig?

In "Memory and Identity," the Pope also calls abortion a "legal extermination" comparable to attempts to wipe out Jews and other groups in the 20th century.

He also reveals that he is convinced the Turkish gunman who shot him in 1981 did not act alone and suggests that the former Communist Bloc may have been behind the plot to kill him.

Ok, supporting Solidarity was a good, even brave, thing to do. So, we have "supporting Solidarity" on one side of the balance sheet, and "otherwise being a fascist shitbag" on the other side. (I encourage readers to do that thing with your hands where you pretend to weigh a set of scales. Right goes up, left goes down; left goes up, right comes down.) Now: isn't it a bummer that '81 was such a bad year for would-be assassins?

The 84-year-old Pontiff's book, a highly philosophical and intricate work on the nature of good and evil, is based on conversations with philosopher friends in 1993 and later with some of his aides.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

In one section about the role of lawmakers, the Pope takes another swipe at gay marriages when he refers to "pressures" on the European Parliament to allow them.

"It is legitimate and necessary to ask oneself if this is not perhaps part of a new ideology of evil, perhaps more insidious and hidden, which attempts to pit human rights against the family and against man," he writes.

No. What's legitimate and necessary is - with all due respect to Berrigan, Day, et al. - for people of conscience to surround the Vatican, evict its decrepit, medieval residents, and use its coffers to subsidize the purchase of a copy of The Origin of Species for every classroom in the world.

The Pope's fifth book for mass circulation, issued by Italian publisher Rizzoli, sparked controversy in Germany and elsewhere after Jewish groups protested against leaked excerpts comparing the Holocaust to abortion.

The difference being, of course, that the Church didn't give a shit about the Holocaust.

In at least two sections of the book, the Pope talks about the Nazi attempt to exterminate Jews and the wholesale slaughter of political opponents by Communist regimes after World War II.

Bold move, pope. You're taking a stand at two almost universally hated political machines while spewing bile about a minority group. The scary thing is that once you die, someone even worse could inherit your throne. (Hey, sounds like the US government!)

The article ends by saying, The Pope says the assassination attempt against him was perhaps "the last convulsion" of the ideologies of the 20th century -- a clear reference to the Communist bloc.

Some of us are still waiting for the last convulsions of the ideologies of the 1st century.

In like a lion

No, I'm not talking about good pal SS's recent adventures in Charm City; I'm talking about the month of March and the art of independent music! A lot going on around these parts. So let's go:

Updates-
--The new Dalek and M83 records have come out and are not in my possession. If you are moved by the Lenten season or whatever, send them to me for free.
--Show #2 for A New Spelling of My Name, which features yours truly, seated and flailing:

Saturday, February 26
Wisconsin Ave. Baptist Church
3920 Alton Place NW
7pm
$5

Renee Heartfelt (x-Count Me Out, Striking Distance, Give Up the Ghost)
Paper doll (last show)
A New Spelling of My Name
Junius (rock from MA)

This is a benefit for the Renfrew Center Foundation for eating disorders.

--A month from today I'm doing a punk show at the Warehouse Next Door. Check it out:

Warehouse Next Door
1017 7th St. NW
8:30pm
$6

Riistetyt (from Finland, started in the early 80s, are old and play fast, pronounced REES-ti-toot)
Endless Nightmare (awesome hc/punk from Philly, first DC show)
Aghast (egregious flailing; and no, the guitar amp is not broken)
1 tba

Ok, moving on . . . the first two weeks of March are a doozy for shows in DC. Here's a rundown of the highlights:

March 1 - Ida and Rachel's at the Black Cat
March 3 - Circle Takes the Square and Rachel Jacobs at the Warehouse Next Door
March 4 - Del Cielo record release show with Haram and others at the Warehouse
March 5 - On Fire and others at the Warehouse
March 9 - Bellalea and Pash at the Black Cat
March 11 - The Evens, somewhere in Mt. Pleasant
March 12 - Panthers at the Warehouse

If that's not enough, April will include US visits from Mono, Melt Banana, and M83 - all playing DC within a week! And I'm not even going to get into all the good music that's supposed to come out in the first half of this year, mainly because I need to encourage myself to allocate scarce resources elsewhere.

If you have music tips that don't suck, you can post them in the comments section!

One Less Wal-Mart

Something about an angel getting its wings comes to mind. Yeah.

Dear New England:

If I had a few thousand loyal, rabid dogs at my disposal, I would set them upon your region. And then, when you're not looking (or dead or infected or whatever), I would kidnap your coach, convert him to Mormonism, force-feed him, and make him grow a mustache. I'm sure you see where this is going. Once I get the dog thing together, you're in deep shit.

A device the opposition can really warm to

It's not news that the US military has been working to develop a non-lethal crowd control device that uses microwaves to heat the skin of people assembling, you know, where they shouldn't, forcing them to scatter. Apparently the mechanism is ready for deployment against unruly crowds in Iraq.

Officials said the vehicle, termed Sheriff, would contain the Active Denial System . . . [which can] be directed at targets at a range of 1 kilometer.

So - basically - this is the Bush administration's approach to press conferences, only with wheels.

The world according to Shrub

Bush the anticapitalist - "I will work with Congress to ensure . . . that human life is never bought and sold as a commodity."

Bush the jokester - "Taking on gang life will be one part of a broader outreach to at-risk youth . . . [T]he leader of this nationwide effort will be our first lady, Laura Bush."

Bush the Mad Hatter - "The United States has no right, no desire, and no intention to impose our form of government on anyone else."

Now, which pill is it that makes him small again?

Coincidence? I think not.

Last night our Dear Leader gave his State of the Union address. This morning, my Merriam Webster's email word of the day is "jingoism."

jingoism \JING-goh-iz-um\ noun : extreme chauvinism or nationalism marked especially by a belligerent foreign policy

Did you know? "Jingoism" originated during the Russo-Turkish War of 1877- 1878, when many British citizens were hostile toward Russia and felt Britain should intervene in the conflict. Supporters of the cause expressed their sentiments in a music-hall ditty with this refrain:

"We don't want to fight, yet by jingo if we do,
We've got the ships, we've got the men,
We've got the money, too!"

Someone holding the attitude implied in the song became known as a "jingo" or "jingoist," and the attitude itself was dubbed "jingoism." The "jingo" in the tune is probably a euphemism for "Jesus."

Amusing

I remember seeing signs for this school when I was living in New England. Man, first Beaver College changes its name to Arcadia, now this... are there any funny school names left? We the people are going to have to start getting more creative with what little material is available. Like my college friend who whited out the "M" on his UMASS hat.